Tuesday, 19 October 2010

To meet and marry (and divorce?)

Some people are just crazy.

Scratch that.


That's better.

I'm watching the Wedding House on Channel 4, and a couple have just got married after knowing each other for 3 months!

Seriously, I've got tins of food in my cupboard older than that.

I've only recently came around to the idea of marriage - and I count recently as January, still longer than 3 months away! I came around to it as a natural progression of my relationship with Gof, and in truth, I feel we have a marriage already. I mean, we have house insurance for goodness sake! The wedding day is, and always has been, simply a day we celebrate our relationship with our loved ones. It is a relationship borne of experience, shared memories and a bond only time could forge. We have been together for 3 years, and our wedding day will fall on our 6th year as a couple. We both agree that this is perfect for us. Our day will be enriched by experiences we have yet to share, and more importantly, we'll have paid off existing debt AND the wedding fees!

Even when I didn't understand or even necessarily agree with the concept of marriage, I still judged those who used it for the reasons that were absolutely against the spirit of the thing. We've all heard the horror stories. Shotgun weddings, weddings for gifts, wedding just to show off. Weddings just to win a honeymoon (I'm looking at you, guilty pleasure Four Weddings!). I always respected the choice to get married, if those choices were based on a mutual love and hope and determination to stay together and grow old together. I even understand that some shotgun weddings have the couples celebrate their 50th anniversary.

But, eurgh. The couple looked distinctly uncomfortable walking down the aisle, one groom just meeting his soon-to-be-husband's parents for the first time 10 minutes previously. I wouldn't be in the least surprised if they had already broken up. It just looked so forced.

Marriage isn't a fashion accessory. I can't relate to the idea that you marry knowing there's an option to divorce. I certainly can't understand the idea that people marry just because they can. I am over joyed that in this country, any people in love can marry regardless of gender, but rushing in just because you can cheapens it for the couples who marry out of genuine and carefully nurtured love.

Is it too much to ask?

Love and marriage apparently go hand in hand.

Or am I just kidding myself?

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